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Hit and Run Living

Have You Found Your Life's Obsession?

Hardy Menagh - Feb. 2006

From early childhood, I could never stick with anything. I would play with a new toy or game for maybe a week, then it would go into the closet never to be seen again until my mother put it in a yard sale. Later my hobbies were the same way.

This drove my parents crazy. "Why can't you find something and stay with it?"

The answer was simple. I would learn what I could from something, and when I had a pretty good understanding of it, the fascination was over. It was time to investigate something new.

This trend continued into young adulthood. I enjoyed acting in my senior year of high school and won Best High School Actor in the state of Minnesota in 1975. That same year I got top honors in a Bass Solo contest. I never pursued either interest further.

I majored in art in college. In my junior year, I exhibited stringed musical instruments that I had designed and built in my spare time. In my senior year, I had a part time job as a potter. By the time I graduated with a Bachelor's in art, I had gotten more articles published than many of my professors.

I'm not bragging - well maybe a little. The problem was, I had finished four years of college with absolutely no desire to start a career in any of my formal areas of study.

Some say this behavior is the result of a "type A" personality, but it's really more like a disorder.

If your life, work, or, even worse, relationships are like this, I'm completely sympathetic. It's a major personality flaw that many of us share. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if there were meetings.

"Hi, my name is Hardy, and I have a hit and run life. It's been a month and four days since I started something else."

You may have a basement full of abandoned projects and hobbies. You probably feel a little guilty. I know I did, but there is hope.

To be honest, I don't think there's anything particularly wrong with a compulsion to explore new areas that interest you. You end up knowing a little bit about a lot of things. That's why people seek a liberal arts education - or at least it should be. A degree may open doors, but broad knowledge and the ability to implement it is the real power.

However, if you are in your 30s or older and you're still skipping from one occupation to another, it may be time for some introspection. You are the only judge of how satisfied you are with your life's choices.

If you can find one career area that constantly presents you with interesting new challenges, you've it made.

This can be difficult for some people, especially if they want to make real money. I found my ideal vocation in historic preservation and period joinery. The work constantly changed and satisfied my need for variety. It definitely wasn't going to make me rich.

When a change in my health terminated my woodworking career, I had to overcome a personal prejudice to find a new one, which sustains me to this day.

That brings me to the second point: You can't be be afraid to really reexamine possibilities that you may have previously dismissed out of hand.

I have a friend who's secure enough in his gender to enjoy building doll houses. Each one of these diminutive structures is its own different little world. He showed me a general store he had built that made you think you were a giant standing over the real thing. Although his primary occupation is driving a truck, he and his wife also own a doll house shop where you can buy materials and kits.

I was actually successful in resisting an impulse to take a kit home with me. I told you there was hope.

The point is, you shouldn't let notions about gender or any other preconceived ideas about career choices stand in the way of your happiness.

I thought I would never connect with computers. It turns out that I have a real aptitude for them. This vast and changing field constantly presents me with new challenges and learning possibilities - and therein lies a potential pitfall.

If you are lucky enough to have found your life's obsession, you may find that you're neglecting other important areas of your life. Some careers can have the same life-destroying potential as an addictive drug. You may find that you are staying at the job longer than you really need to and neglecting your spouse, family, or friendships.

I have to admit, I have eaten my supper in front of the monitor more than once. There are times of emergency when this is necessary. If it becomes habit, you may find that you have missed important portions of your family's lives and convinced them that you love your work more than them.

Being focused is a wonderful thing, but it's important to recognize obsessions, whether they involve your work or play. Try to schedule times when you take the blinders off and see what's going on around you.

Speaking of which, I'm going to shut down the computer and find out how my wife's day was. She always provides me with new challenges.

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Hit and Run Living

Have You Found Your Life's Obsession?

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