Inside sources tell us a customer was denied warranty service
because Chiquita Banana sticker voided the warranty on Titanium G4.
The names and locations have been changed to protect the parties
involved.
A customer, "John Doe," was denied warranty-covered service on his
PowerBook G4 due to a "factory-unauthorized modification." When
bringing the TiBook to his local Apple dealer for replacement of a
defective trackpad, he was told the warranty was void. The full
explanation from the technician: "The Chiquita Banana sticker is
obviously not an Apple approved part, nor could I order one for my
PowerBook from Apple. It defiantly voids the warranty because it is a
factory unauthorized modification. This has far reaching
implications. If this were allowed, we could be allowing all kinds of
crazy stuff - like that guy with the fuzzy dice inside his
Cube."
John Doe says, "It was just a little sticker. When I put it
on there, my girlfriend smiled and said she might get a PowerBook G4
so she could put stickers on it. If Apple knew what her reaction was,
they would encourage such activity. At least that's what I thought at
the time.
"You've seen the commercials, guy uses computer in plane - people
smile. Couple gets married on the beach - parents watch DVD they
created. So what would one sticker be? Simply an extension for the
Mac to draw people into buying one."
Our initial interview lasted ten hours, but we can only comment on
how distraught he was. His crusade didn't stop there, and we commend
B..., uh, John Doe for continuing the fight for his right to be heard
- right up until the last moments of his career in aerospace
engineering. The rest is from another source, his girlfriend (now
wife), as he was unable to meet with our source a second time.
It all started when he appealed to the national Apple center.
[Eds' note: The technician immediately reported the incident,
therefore Apple only had to wait until John complained.] After an
initial talk over the phone he was invited to bring the laptop in so
Apple could assess the problem. He arrived at the building at the
appointed time and went inside. (From here on, another trusted source
gives the account)
He was sent from one room to another to show the sticker to
executives. There were varied reactions, but the result was the same
- send him to the design lab. He had the hardest time there, where
they pointed out how it ruined the PowerBook's clean lines and
two-tone appearance. Laughing, Mr. X pointed out ten better
places to have put the sticker, places where it would have increased
the value of the notebook three-hundred-fold. Mrs. Y was no
kinder, assessing how much residue was left over from pulling it
off.
Finishing up, Doe was led to an auditorium deep in the heart of
the top-secret Apple Tech Service Warrenty Center (from which, might
I add, no commoner returns). Our source points out he was forced to
watch videos of sticker-covered Mac's being smashed. After he was
"reformed," there was a crash course in ID, followed by Apple
technician certification. Although Clockwork Orange comes to mind,
there were never any hints of violence in his early childhood, except
to his dad's Newton.
All Doe remembers from this experience
is a very bright light - and then nothing. There is little to say
but that he is a quiet man now, working part time in the R&D
center and fixing Mac's on the side. His wife often comments on how
he was lucky it had not been an Intel sticker!
Apple would not comment on the matter and disavows knowledge of
any human sized mind altering equipment, nor a Top Secret Center, nor
John Doe. After all, it can't be top secret if people know where the
national research building is.
- Anne Onymus
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experience
is a very bright light - and then nothing. There is little to say
but that he is a quiet man now, working part time in the R&D
center and fixing Mac's on the side. His wife often comments on how
he was lucky it had not been an Intel sticker!
