Change It Up! We Don’t Want an iPhone 18S Plus!

Remember the old days, back when Apple used names for its computers? Well I sure do, and I have a lot of fond memories of machines with names such as Performa, Centris, and Quadra. Sure the names were meaningless, but it made the machines sound that much more important.

Apple has hit more home runs in its history than any other company, and its current iPhone lineup (5c, 5s, 6, and 6 Plus) is no exception. I do however believe that it could be given a totally new image if they were more creative with the names. I mean honestly, is there really going to be an iPhone 18S Plus someday? I certainly hope not.

Here is what I think the next generation of iPhones should be:

iPhone Classica: The Smartphone for the Rest of Us

iPhone Classica would be the new entry-level iPhone specifically for folks looking for a compact smartphone. It will use the iPhone 5c form factor, but in a new black color scheme. It will feature a 4″ 1136 x 640 resolution display, A7 processor, 1 GB of RAM, 16 GB of storage, and an 8 MP camera. It should retail for $449 – or free with a 2 year contract.

iPhone Sportra: The High Performance Smartphone for the Rest of Us

iPhone Sportra is geared towards consumers who demand higher performance out of their iPhone. It has an all new form factor with a plastic shell similar to the iPhone Classic, but in multiple colors (red, green, yellow, blue, black, white), and would have a chrome band around the display. It will feature a 4″ 1136 x 640 resolution display; A8 processor; 2 GB of RAM; 32, 64, or 128 GB of storage; an 8 MP camera with burst mode and slowmo video, TouchID, and Apple Pay. It should retail for $549/$599/$649 (32/64/128) contract free or $99/$149/$199 (32/64/128) with contract.

iPhone Centra: The Business iPhone

iPhone Centra is the new High Performance Business Class iPhone. Using the same form factor as the as the iPhone 6 in either Space Grey or Silver, it will feature a 4.7″ 1334 x 750 resolution display, the new High Performance A9 processor, 2 GB of RAM, 64 or 128 GB of storage, 14 MP camera with burst mode and slowmo video, TouchID, Apple Pay, and a new Lightning 2 connector which supports both USB 3 and ThunderBolt 2 standards for faster syncing with your computer. It should retail for $699/$749 (64/128) contract free or $249/$299 (64/128) with contract.

iPhone Quadris: The Big Business iPhone

iPhone Quadris has the same components as the iPhone Centra, but with a larger 5.5″ 1920 x 1080 display. It should retail for $749/$799 (64/128) contract free or $299/$349 (64/128) with contract.

iPhone Edition: The Most Expensive iPhone Ever

iPhone Edition is for those of you who want an iPhone designed to complement your Apple Watch Edition. iPhone Edition is mechanically identical to the iPhone Centra and Quadris (depending on the size you pick), except it features an all new 18K solid gold enclosure. It is the ultimate expression of iPhone design, starting at just $30,000.

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