This message is being sent to warn you of a new email virus which is
being reported by the National Early Virus
Alert Mechanism and Organized Response
Enterprise. The virus is especially insidious because it comes
on the heels of the severely destructive "I Love You" virus, which
caused billions of dollars worth of damage to computer systems across
the world.
The new virus is a copycat, which uses many of the same mechanisms
as the Love Bug. It is important that users be aware of its destructive
potential. You are hereby warned not to, under any circumstances, open
an email from anyone that has the subject heading, "I Hate You." If
opened, the virus will infect your email software and work in the
background to complete a specific ruinous operation. The "Hate Bug"
virus has the potential to cause far greater harm worldwide than the
Love Bug - whereas previous viruses simply destroy files or even whole
drives, the new virus has the potential to destroy entire families.
Reports from the field indicate the virus behaves in the following
way:
Upon activation, the virus opens email software address book and
sends a message to the user's mother-in-law. It is able to target the
mother-in-law of the user because of a known flaw in Microsoft Outlook
programming (see Tech Article MIL673X97 for details). The message to
the mother-in-law contains unflattering language, is generally
insulting, and contains the subject heading mentioned above. One thing
about the virus that makes it especially insidious is that it is
virtually impossible to determine whether or not your computer has been
infected. There are no telltale signs; no files or drives are deleted.
The virus's one effect on the user's computer is the immediate
transmission of the email message to the mother-in-law. Once the
message has been sent, the virus disappears from the computer. You will
know your computer has been infected only if you receive an upset
return email or telephone call from your spouse's mother. The resulting
confusion and family disarray can have a far greater impact on the
user's state of mind and well-being than the deletion of files or hard
drives.
All major virus detection websites are advising users of PCs
containing the Windows operating system to contact their mothers-in-law
with reconciliatory messages - better yet, send a gift of flowers to
them in order to ward off any damage the virus may have caused. Because
of the virus's ability to avoid detection, the gift method of
mother-in-law appeasement is the only sure way of combating this
insidious virus. Unmarried users have little to fear from this new
virus, although it has been reported that some users who are engaged to
be married have experienced difficulty.
Please send a copy of this Virus Alert to every individual in your
address book. It is especially critical that you do this if that
individual is married and you know that they would like to stay that
way.
Thank you,
Bud B. Downing
N.E.V.A.M.O.R.E.
- Andrew Minson is tired of hearing about Windows viruses, Word macro
viruses, Outlook email viruses, and viruses that don't even exist
(e.g., Good Times), so he invented one of his own. I this has whetted
your appetite for a good virus hoax, we also recommend Gullibility Virus Spread Over Internet!
Share your perspective on the Mac by emailing with "My Turn" as your subject.
