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The Lite Side

More Microsoft Blunders

- 2002.04.15

How many blunders can one megalopoly endure? First it was dead people writing in support of the Redmond juggernaut, and the next thing you know Microsoft is hosting an anti-Unix web site on a Unix server. Presented here for efficiency's sake are some prefabricated (emphasis on the fabricated) errors we're likely to see Microsoft make, courtesy of the Lite Side.

10. Microsoft reveals that corporate budgets are written in Lotus Notes

9. Scott Adams reveals that Microsoft was his inspiration for the Dilbert comic strip, suggesting that Windows bugs are written by programmers seeking bonuses for eliminating them

8. Bill Gates tries to hide a flat panel iMac in his mansion during Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous by throwing hot-chili-pepper motif cooking apron over it

7. Steve Ballmer's dance class payments are intercepted due to a security hole in IIS.

6. Microsoft Corp refuses Hotmail accounts to former President Nixon's family because it believes Nixon is a new variant of Unix

5. MSN employees routinely docked pay for giving solutions to problems poorly documented in online help files.

4. It turns out Enron actually had plenty of money but was trying to run their business off of old copy of Microsoft Money.

3. Hotmail server drops site domain registration two years running.

2. Fox News reports Geraldo was navigating using a GPS connected to a PocketPC.

1. Bill Gates loses access to corporate network during COMDEX presentation due to failure to register his "backup office copy " of Windows XP.

Recent Lite Sides

You Might Be a Computer Geek If..., 06.17. 20 signs that you just might possibly be a computer geek.
What if Apple thought like a PC company?, 11.01. Apple has innovated and blazed its own trail. But what if it had followed the path taken by the PC copycats?
How Microsoft can turn Vista lemons into lemonade, 10.22. How Microsoft could profit by no longer allowing manufacturers to sell new PCs with Windows XP installed.
iPods that never passed beta or focus groups, 09.13. "What most Apple fans don't realize is that there were a few iPod variants that never made it out of beta testing and the focus group stage."
More in the The Lite Side index.

Links for the Day

Mac of the Day: 15" MacBook Pro Core Duo, Jan. 2006 - The first Intel-based MacBook launched at 1.83-2.0 GHz, had several teething problems.
Group of the Day: System 6 is the email list for those who choose System 6.
November 22 in LEM history: 99: Gradebooks - 00: Leveraging Apple design - Quadra 630 to Power Mac 5200 - 02: Laptop or desktop? - 04: SuperDuper: Quick, easy, efficient backup - Cross-platform programming for the rest of us - 05: Mac video surveillance on the cheap - Which OS is best for my vintage Mac? - No 'best browser' for the Mac - Sorry state of browsers for classic Macs - 06: Core 2 means cooler running 'Books - 2.0 GHz G4 upgrade
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Recent Deals

Best eMac Deals, 11.18. Used 1 GHz Combo, $100; SuperDrive, $269; 1.25 GHz Combo, $119; SD, $319; 1.42 GHz Combo, $289; SD, $498.
Best Mac OS X 10.6 and Mac Box Set Deals, 11.18. "Snow Leopard", single user, $25; 5 users, $45; Mac Box Set, single user, $139; 5 users, $180; Server, $414. Shipping included.
Best Xserve Deals, 11.18. Used 1 GHz dual G4, $649; 2.3 dual G5, $795; 3.0 4-core Xeon, $1,899; refurb 2.26 4-core, $2,499; new, $2,888; refurb 8-core, $2,999; new, $3,449; more.
Best 15" MacBook Pro Deals, 11.17. Used 1.83 GHz, $750; 2.16, $800; 2.33, $900; refurb 2.4, $1,299; 2.53, $1,449; 2.66, $1,699; 2.8, $1,899; new 2.53, $1,579; 2.66, $1,799; more.
Best Power Mac G4 and AGP Video Card Deals, 11.17. Used 400 MHz, $50; 933 MHz, $80; 500 dual, $60; 867 dual, $90; 1 GHz dual, $150; 1.25 GHz dual, $225; 1.42 GHz, $499.
Best Mac OS X 10.5 Deals, 11.17. "Leopard" upgrade, $80; single user license, $135; 5 users, $173; Mac Box Set, 5 users, $230; Server, 10 users, $340; unlimited, $850. Shipping included.
Best Mac mini Deals, 11.16. Used 1.42 GHz G4 mini, $379; 1.66 GHz Core Solo, $419; 2.0 Core 2, $450; new 2.26 GHz nVidia, $580; 2.53 GHz, $769; Server, $990.
Best iBook G4 Deals, 11.16. Used 12" 1.07 GHz Combo, $210; 1.33 GHz, $298; 14" 1.33 GHz, $398; 1.42 GHz, $479; SuperDrive, $498.
Best iPod shuffle Deals, 11.16. Used 1 GB, $35; 4 GB, $65; refurb 1 GB, $39; 2 GB, $59; new 2 GB, $55, 4 GB, $75. New and refurb prices include shipping.
More deals in our archive.

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